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This is a potato Solamum tebersum

Captain Cook sailed to New Zealand on the Endeavour.

The Earth
gets one hundred tons heavier every day
due to falling space dust.

Venus is the only planet that rotates clockwise.

Jupiter is bigger than all the other planets combined.

1. Chop potatoes into quarters
2. Simmer in salted water for 15-20 minutes until tender
3. Heat milk, butter and nutmeg
4. Drain potatoes and mash
5. Mix in the milk mixture

• 1kg King Edward Potatoes
• 100ml Milk
• 50g salted butter
• Freshly grated nutmeg
• Salt and pepper to taste

Scrambled Eggs

Eggs are one of my favourite foods. here is a recipe for deliciously rich scrambled eggs.

Ingeredients

• 2 eggs
• 1 tbs butter
• 2 tbs cream

Method

1. Melt butter in a frying pan over medium heat.
2. Gently mix the eggs and cream in a bowl.
3. Once butter has melted and cream and eggs.
4. Using a spatula fold the eggs from the edge of the pan to the centre every 20 seconds (as if you are making an omelette).
5. When the eggs are still moist remove the heat (it will continue to cook on the plate until served).

This is a red paragraph

This is a chocolate color heading

• Google
• Sebastian's Low Quality Website
• Disney+
• Netflix

Red

A great colour for restaurant walls. Red stimulates the appetite and encourages people to spend more. Do you have trouble getting out of bed in the morning? Paint the bedroom red. Chances are you will leap out of bed.

Blue

If you’re on a diet, eating areas should be blue. This is a colour that suppresses the appetite. However, blue is a bad colour for living rooms or party rooms because it encourages people to relax and not talk to each other.

Yellow

Although yellow may seem like a happy colour, it increases irritability.

Avoid painting a room bright yellow, instead use light yellow in a small area if contrast is needed.

Green

This is the colour of perfect balance. It encourages feelings of relaxation and comfort. Actors are often asked to wait in the green room before they perform. It's also great for a bedroom.

Rugby at Lynfield College

More recipes:

The Hobbit to be filmed in Nelson

Sir Peter Jackson's movie The Hobbit is set to be filmed in Nelson at the end of this year, with hundreds of crew members expected to stay in the region.

Local moteliers have been contacted by the film's production company, 3 Foot 7, which is looking for accommodation for about 400 to 500 people in November and December. Motel Association of New Zealand Nelson's John Gilbertson, who owns Arrow Motels on Golf Rd, confirmed some of the association's members were holding rooms for such a group.

Filming for the anticipated two-part movie resumed last week and will continue until December. The film features international celebrities such as Evangeline Lilly, Orlando Bloom, Stephen Fry, James Nesbitt and Martin Freeman.

Mr Gilbertson said 3 Foot 7 made inquiries for booking 400 to 500 rooms in early December in Nelson and Golden Bay. He said there were 50 Nelson members in the association with more than 700 rooms among them, so members could accommodate the film bookings across the region.

The Hobbit publicist Melissa Booth said she was unable to confirm locations as they were in the throes of filming. "We're just looking forward and trying to get the film made. I think everyone is happy to be back at work."

Pohara motelier Steve du Feu said the filming of The Hobbit was "good news" for businesses in Golden Bay. His motel, The Sandcastle, is one of a number in Golden Bay that have been booked out by 3 Foot 7 for 10 days in mid-November and a week in early December. "The increased activity in the bay associated with this will be an awesome boost after what has been a pretty quiet winter. The crew will be made to feel very welcome," he said.

Bob Haswell of Clifftops Retreat in Ruby Bay said he had friends working on the film in Wellington and "it looks like some of them might be coming to Nelson". Mr Haswell is connected to Tasman Helicopters, which was involved during the filming of parts of The Lord of the Rings trilogy in the Nelson region, but he said the company had not been approached about helping with The Hobbit.

Nelson Mayor Aldo Miccio said the likelihood that The Hobbit crew might be coming to Nelson was news to him, but he was not surprised. "It's in line with what we have been hearing – that Nelson is going to be a destination for filming."

Child Phone Addicts

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There was a time when children's telecommunications meant two cans connected with string or, for luckier kids, a set of walkie-talkies. But today the mobile phone has become ubiquitous in school playgrounds, with children as young as five having their own. A company in England is even targeting toddlers with a phone designed in the shape of a teddy bear.

Three-quarters of Australian children aged 12 to 14 own a mobile phone but by the time they are 15 that number surges to 90 per cent, according to figures from the Australian Communications and Media Authority.

"Because it's parents who come in and sign up for the phones it's difficult to say exactly how much this area has grown but the age at which kids get phones is getting younger," says Carmen Gould, head of customer service at Australian retail chain Crazy John's. "Whereas before it was often teenagers getting mobiles, it's not unusual now for parents to buy phones for children as young as eight."

Why do they have phones?

Most parents cite the peace of mind that comes from being able to contact their children at any time as the main reason behind the trend. "All research into this trend suggests that parents believe that they can improve the safety and security of their children by giving them a phone," says Randal Markey of the Australian Mobile Telecommunications Association.

This view is backed by the most recent study of mobile use among youngsters by the NSW Commission for Children and Young People. After interviewing 1500 children for its Mobile Me report, it concluded it was nearly always parents who decided to get their children phones - to contact them in "case of emergencies". The other reason was that a phone would give greater independence.

Researchers speak out:

• In September a Swedish scientist said children and teenagers were five times more likely to get brain cancer if they used a mobile phone.
• Psychologists have warned children can become too reliant on their phones - or "phone addicts".
• Academics suggest that kids are ill prepared to understand the financial responsibilities that come with a mobile phone.
• Some children run up bills of over $500 per month ($6000 per year)
• Young people are more easily drawn into costly long term plans with the offer of cheap or even free phones if they sign up for 12 or 24 month plans
• Most contentious is the research linking mobiles to brain tumours. While the World Health Organisation and the Australian Radiation Protection and Nuclear Safety Agency say there is no evidence of this connection, some researchers say thinner skulls and smaller brains put children at greater risk.

"It can be a huge problem for some children, who can run up bills of up to $500 a month. They have little concept of what they are spending - this can lead to getting into constant debt, a very bad financial situation which they can carry on into their adult life with things like credit cards."

As for addiction, two Spanish teenagers made headlines around the world in June when they were admitted to a mental health clinic for "phone addiction". The children, 12 and 13, were sent there by their parents, who said they could not carry out normal activities without their mobiles and would spend six hours a day on them.

Such extreme behaviour is uncommon, Queensland University of Technology psychologist Shari Walsh says. "There are certainly teenagers who we are seeing that have an over-reliance on their mobiles and who become anxious at the prospect of going without their phone. "They worry that they'll run out of battery or credit and they'll be forced to go without this way of communicating with their network of friends. It's a big fear for them and it illustrates just how important they see the phone as being to their lives."

Cell Phone Learning Tools

Sebastian's Meme Website Go to the top of the page

All Whites Win in Wellington

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You could say it was a $13 million save. But to Tony Lochhead, the man who thought he'd cost New Zealand a spot at the biggest sporting show on earth, Mark Paston's heroics were priceless. For 88 minutes on Saturday night, Westpac Stadium was abuzz. But for the other two, there was almost a deathly silence.

It is the 51st minute and referee Jorge Larrionda rules Lochhead has brought down Bahrain's Abdulla Omar inside the box and awards a penalty. It is surreal. Despite a record crowd of 35,194, you could have heard a pin drop.

Lochhead's heart was firmly entrenched in his mouth as he contemplated the potentially devastating scenario, given that a 1-1 draw would have seen Bahrain qualify on the away-goals rule.

"I thought I had cost us a trip to the World Cup," the Phoenix defender said."I thought I'd done enough to get there but [Omar] just managed to get in front of me. I didn't really touch him that much, but he went down pretty easily and the ref pointed to the spot. It was such a nerve-racking moment but Pasty has come up with an unbelievable save and he's saved my skin, big time."

"It wasn't a good feeling, but when he saved it I was celebrating as if I had scored myself."

All Whites captain Ryan Nelsen had his money on Paston to save the shot of Bahrain's rangy centre back, Sayed Mohamed Adnan.

Nelsen, who led manfully, was fifth in line to take a penalty in the eventuality of a shootout and he had lined up himself against Paston in training last week.

"I can remember taking a penalty at practice and looking up and seeing Pasty, and I couldn't see any of the goal.

"I just saw this big guy in front of it, so I knew he had a chance of saving it and in the end he pulled off a world-class save."

"I said to him before the Bahrain game that for us to go through we're going to need a world-class keeper and world-class saves, and throughout 180 minutes he proved incredible."

Paston, 32, the Phoenix goalkeeper who hails from Hawke's Bay, was swamped by his team-mates after the final whistle. They knew how big a part he had played in getting the team to South Africa.

But the big stopper, who probably would not have even been playing on Saturday had Glen Moss not been suspended, was typically down to earth after the initial euphoria.

"I just guessed, actually," he nonchalantly stated of the penalty.

"Apparently they [the coaching staff] were trying to get it out to me from the sideline that [Adnan] goes right, but it didn't get to me, so it's a good job I went that way. He didn't hit the best penalty, but I went the right way and it stuck."

Asked if he had prepared for it, Paston said: "Yeah, but I thought it would be at the end of the game, not in the middle of it."

He heaped praise on the men in front of him.

"The whole second half, the boys were incredible. They were diving into tackles and all sorts. It comes down to that, it was amazing what they did for me."

And it is amazing what Paston and his team-mates have done for football. Not only did he play a major part in getting the team to the World Cup, but the cash injection for the sport – about $13 million just by qualification – will be crucial.

New Zealand Tours designed to enrich your holiday experience

Our aim has been to position ourselves apart from the mainstream and surprise the market again and again with innovative ideas and new concepts. As you browse through our Website you will find evidence of the product variety and the fresh approach we are taking to create an enriching holiday experience for our clients.

We have positioned ourselves as the market leader for nationwide 4x4 touring, in the self-drive tours as well as in the escorted group tours segment.

Our Hiking, Trekking Bike, Campervan, Motorhome and Self-Fly "soft adventure" packages are legendary! If you were looking for an experience, which not only shows you the known highlights of New Zealand but also delivers an insight into life away from the normal tourist tracks, you would be well served by choosing one of our tours!

Self Drive Rental Car Tour - with a difference

• 20 / 24 days from Auckland via Stewart Island to Christchurch
• Experience New Zealand as never before. From top to bottom, you'll see the country in its entirety including the most important National Parks.
• Apart from the well known regions also explore less frequented parts of the country such as Mount Taranaki (Egmont National Park), Stewart Island and the Catlins on the way to Dunedin.
• Beginning in either Christchurch or Auckland your holiday can also be shortened to twenty days by cutting out the northernmost stretch of the journey.

Hiking Tours

Over the years we have conducted countless guided Hiking Tours for groups and we can therefore draw on a lot of experience.

Our tour guides know New Zealand extremely well and like to share their love for New Zealand´s pristine environment with our customers.

We are able to custom design Hiking Tours for groups of every size, starting from small minibus tours to larger coach tours.

If you are looking for a hiking arrangement for your group please let us know and we will gladly work out a suitable itinerary and present you with a quotation.

Motorhome Freewheeler option: Explore New Zealand independently.You can choose your overnight and daily stays as you wish. This option gives you maximum flexibility.

Campgrounds: Reservations for space are highly recommended during the New Zealand summer holidays in January.

Motorhome Inclusive option: All campgrounds in holiday parks are included in the booking!

• The routes have been especially picked for you and some of them take you into remote regions.
Apart from the remote countryside you will also visit many of the well known highlights of New Zealand. Detailed route - and driving instructions will enable you to reach your daily destination without any difficulties. Departures available daily. Due to weather conditions the itinerary can change at short notice. 2 to 6 berth Motorhome options including mountain bike carrier (optional) for two bikes. The tour can be booked including mountain bikes!

By 4x4 or normal Rental Car, inclusive of Trekking Bikes, pre-booked accommodation and suggestions for local bike excursions!

• Our 22-Day Drive and Bike Tour is the perfect combination of comfort, independence and physical activity!
• We look after the tour organisation and you enjoy as much physical activity as you opt for - you are in charge of this part of your holiday!
• In your supplied tour manual you are supported by detailed driving instructions, which help you to reach your driving destination and accommodation, from where you will then be able to start your bike tours if you so desire.
• The tour has been designed for clients of all levels of fitness and we offer options for beginners as well as for experienced bikers. There are always other options available, should you not be in the mood for cycling.
• Experience New Zealand's incredible and varied landscape - see the majority of the well known "highlights" but also get out there amongst it on a bike!

Going one better, Rest New Zealand Tours and its joint venture aviation partners have developed a unique tour package called "The New Zealand Sky Safari" just for those tourists with a yearning for a personalised aviation adventure.

Flying from one highlight to the next within New Zealand's diverse landscape and exploring the exciting ground activities on the way are the ingredients of this memorable fun holiday.

Regatta with a difference

Most Australians will be concentrating on the federal election on August 21, but in Alice Springs there is a major diversion scheduled for that date - the annual Henley-on-Todd River Regatta.

Although originally inspired by England's annual Henley-on-Thames Regatta, the Alice version couldn't be more different. The English one is an upper-class social event with a full programme of rowing events.

   

The Alice event is a chaotic mix of races between home-made, bottomless boats of all descriptions, carried by teams of runners down the dry bed of the Todd River - pictures of which have appeared in newspapers all over the world.

A bathtub race is another feature.

The river bed is normally dry in mid-winter, and the regatta has been cancelled only once in its 48-year history. Water has flowed four times this year, but organisers are confident that won't happen for this year's event.

   

Race day starts with a parade down Todd Mall before the opening ceremony at 11am. Regatta Commodore Ron Saint says he would like to see all those making their own boats joining in.

Race prizes on offer include vouchers from Alice Springs businesses and there's a draw for $500 among all competitors

The day concludes with the Battle Boat Spectacular between the Vikings, the Pirates and a Naval crew with water-pistols and flour bombs as weapons.

The regatta is a money-raiser for the three Rotary clubs of Alice Springs.

Entry Costs for the Henley-On-Todd Regatta are $12 Adult, $5 children and $25 Family. Registrations to enter any of the events can be taken on the day at no extra cost.

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FAQ

1. Where is the Henley-On-Todd Regatta held?
   In Alice Springs, in the Todd River, just to the North of Todd Mall.


2. What time does the parade start?
   10.30am in Todd Street and makes its way down Todd Mall to the Todd River where the event is held.


3. What time do the races start?
   11.45am


4. How can I get involved in the boat races?
   There are many ways to get involved in the event. You can bring your own boat and participate in the :”BYO” boat races
   You can register at the event on the day. Just have a look at the wide variety of events available and then sign up at the entry tent on event day. There is also be an entry form in the Sandy Mariner – the event program, simply fill in the details and drop it to the entries tent on the day. You can also enter ONLINE before the big day.


5. How long has the Henley-On-Todd Regatta been going?
   2010 sees the running of the 49th Henley-On-Todd. The event is the single longest running event in the Northern Territory and has been labelled an Iconic Event for the Territory.


6. Do we have to supply our own boats to enter a race?
   No all vessels and equipment is supplied for competitors.
   Unless you wish to take part in the “BYO Boat” races – you then need to design and supply your own boat.


7. Has the Henley-On-Todd Regatta ever been cancelled?
   Yes! In 1993 there was too much water in the Todd River and the event had to be cancelled due to Flooding!


8. How can I get my school involved?
   There are races specifically designed for school groups. Why not enter your school in the Head of the river races! Simply turn up on the day and enter your team at the entries tent located on the bank of the River.


9. Is there plenty of shade to sit under at the event?
   Yes but be sure to slip, slop, slap.

	Good Rules, But wrong Man!
Urban Myth Laws			Link to Sykes Laws
	Bill Gates	Charles J. Sykes
	RULE 1......Life is not fair; get used to it.	Rule No. 1: Life is not fair. Get used to it. The average teen-ager uses the phrase, "It's not fair" 8.6 times a day. You got it from your parents, who said it so often you decided they must be the most idealistic generation ever. When they started hearing it from their own kids, they realized Rule No. 1.

Some rules kids won't learn in school

Text By Charles J. Sykes Printed in San Diego Union Tribune September 19, 1996

Unfortunately, there are some things that children should be learning in school, but don't. Not all of them have to do with academics. As a modest back-to-school offering, here are some basic rules that may not have found their way into the standard curriculum.

Rule No. 1: Life is not fair. Get used to it. The average teen-ager uses the phrase, "It's not fair" 8.6 times a day. You got it from your parents, who said it so often you decided they must be the most idealistic generation ever. When they started hearing it from their own kids, they realized Rule No. 1.

Rule No. 2: The real world won't care as much about your self-esteem as much as your school does. It'll expect you to accomplish something before you feel good about yourself. This may come as a shock. Usually, when inflated self-esteem meets reality, kids complain it's not fair. (See Rule No. 1)

Rule No. 3: Sorry, you won't make $40,000 a year right out of high school. And you won't be a vice president or have a car phone either. You may even have to wear a uniform that doesn't have a Gap label.

Rule No. 4: If you think your teacher is tough, wait 'til you get a boss. He doesn't have tenure, so he tends to be a bit edgier. When you screw up, he's not going to ask you how you feel about it.

Rule No. 5: Flipping burgers is not beneath your dignity. Your grand-parents had a different word of burger flipping. They called it opportunity. They weren't embarrassed making minimum wage either. They would have been embarrassed to sit around talking about Kurt Cobain all weekend.

Rule No. 6: It's not your parents' fault. If you screw up, you are responsible. This is the flip side of "It's my life," and "You're not the boss of me," and other eloquent proclamations of your generation. When you turn 18, it's on your dime. Don't whine about it, or you'll sound like a baby boomer.

Rule No. 7: Before you were born your parents weren't as boring as they are now. They got that way paying your bills, cleaning up your room and listening to you tell them how idealistic you are. And by the way, before you save the rain forest from the blood-sucking parasites of your parents' generation, try delousing the closet in your bedroom.

Rule No. 8: Your school may have done away with winners and losers. Life hasn't. In some schools, they'll give you as many times as you want to get the right answer. Failing grades have been abolished and class valedictorians scrapped, lest anyone's feelings be hurt. Effort is as important as results. This, of course, bears not the slightest resemblance to anything in real life. (See Rule No. 1, Rule No. 2 and Rule No. 4)

Rule No. 9: Life is not divided into semesters, and you don't get summers off. Not even Easter break. They expect you to show up every day. For eight hours. And you don't get a new life every 10 weeks. It just goes on and on. While we're at it, very few jobs are interesting in fostering your self-expression or helping you find yourself. Fewer still lead to self-realization. (See Rule No. 1 and Rule No. 2.)

Rule No. 10: Television is not real life. Your life is not a sitcom. Your problems will not all be solved in 30 minutes, minus time for commercials. In real life, people actually have to leave the coffee shop to go to jobs. Your friends will not be as perky or pliable as Jennifer Aniston.

Rule No. 11: Be nice to nerds. You may end up working for them. We all could.

Rule No. 12: Smoking does not make you look cool. It makes you look moronic. Next time you're out cruising, watch an 11-year-old with a butt in his mouth. That's what you look like to anyone over 20. Ditto for "expressing yourself" with purple hair and/or pierced body parts.

Rule No. 13: You are not immortal. (See Rule No. 12.) If you are under the impression that living fast, dying young and leaving a beautiful corpse is romantic, you obviously haven't seen one of your peers at room temperature lately.

Rule No. 14: Enjoy this while you can. Sure parents are a pain, school's a bother, and life is depressing. But someday you'll realize how wonderful it was to be a kid. Maybe you should start now.

You're welcome ! HOME

Facts on Fireworks(pahu ahi)

History of Guy Fawkes

A brief history of the world's favorite explosives

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Fireworks

For hundreds of years, even before Francis Scott Key wrote of seeing "the rockets' red glare, the bombs bursting in air," people have been awed by the bright lights and big noise of fireworks. The ancient Chinese used fireworks at festivities and to frighten enemies in battle. Captain John Smith set them off in Jamestown in 1608, enjoying a bit of English popular entertainment and impressing Native Americans.

Smoky Origins

Legend has it that the Chinese made the first fireworks in the 800s, filling bamboo shoots with gunpowder and exploding them at the New Year with the hope that the sound would scare away evil spirits. According to tradition, Marco Polo brought this technology back to Europe. It's fair to say, however, that the origins of fireworks are shrouded in smoke; the China story is widespread, and possibly true, but fireworks may in fact have developed in India or the Arab world. Fireworks became known in Europe during the 1300s, probably after returning Crusaders brought them from the East.

Explosive Popularity

By the 1400s Florence, Italy, was the center of fireworks manufacturing. At this time fireworks were just one effect in a celebration rather than its focus. At religious festivals Italians made plaster figures that spewed fireworks from their eyes and mouths. The 1533 coronation parade for Anne Boleyn included a papier-mache dragon that belched fire. During the 1700s displays became more elaborate and were popular with European royalty. French king Louis XV ordered extravagant displays of fireworks at Versailles, and Russian czar Peter the Great put on a five-hour show after the birth of his son. Meanwhile, in the American colonies settlers used fireworks to mark happy occasions. Today fireworks are a key part of celebrating Independence Day in the United States, Guy Fawkes' Day in the United Kingdom, Bastille Day in France, and New Year festivities around the world.

COMMON COLOURS
Blue	Copper salts
Gold	Aluminum, magnesium
Green	Barium salts
Red	Strontium salts
White	Aluminum, magnesium
Yellow	Sodium salts

Colour by Fire

Early fireworks were enjoyed more for the sound than the show—in its simplest forms gunpowder explodes quickly, leaving a terrific bang but not much to see other than a rather brief golden glow. Over time people discovered that using chemical compounds with greater amounts of oxygen made the explosives burn brighter and longer. The multi-hued displays we know now began in the 1830s, when Italians added trace amounts of metals that burn at high temperatures, creating beautiful colors. Other additives also produced interesting effects. For example, calcium deepens colors, titanium makes sparks, and zinc creates smoke clouds.

Dangerous Risk?

Armed with this knowledge, some aficionados enjoy trying to create their own fireworks. But these creations are even more dangerous and unpredictable than legal fireworks. Because homemade fireworks are often made from parts of other fireworks, they can contain deadly amounts of explosive powders.

A Brief History Of Guy Fawkes Day

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In 1605 Fawkes unsuccessfully attempted to commit the infamous act of terror of blowing up King James I and the Houses of Parliament.

The English, among other talents, are adept at nurturing their grudges. How else does one explain the enduring enmity toward Guy Fawkes, a conspirator in a plot to blow up Parliament in 1605? Some four centuries after Fawkes was caught, tortured and executed for his role in a scheme that never came to fruition, Britons still celebrate his demise each Nov. 5 by burning his likeness in effigy and setting fireworks ablaze. One of the ironies of Fawkes' legacy is that he was a late addition to the infamous "Gunpowder Plot."

Born a Protestant in 1570, Fawkes enlisted in the Spanish army in the Netherlands around 1593, shortly after converting to Catholicism. Co-conspirators:

• Robert Catesby
• Thomas Winter
• Thomas Percy
• John Wright

enlisted Fawkes as a ringer, reasoning that his military skills ”he had participated in the 1595 capture of Calais, France” and his anonymity as a foreign soldier made him an ideal candidate to help execute their plan. Fawkes' henchmen were zealous Catholics who believed that by beheading the government, they might usher in a new era of Catholicism in Protestant England.

Led by Catesby, they hatched a plan to explode gunpowder under Parliament during a state opening, when King James I, his queen, and other family members and government eaders were inside.

The plot was set for Nov. 5, 1605, and in the preceding days, the conspirators rented a cellar underneath the building, where Fawkes stashed at least 20 barrels of gunpowder. Things didn't go according to plan. The plotters sought wider support, and, as the story goes, one of the individuals to whom they reached out alerted his brother-in-law, a lord, not to attend Parliament on Nov. 5. The building was searched, and Fawkes was apprehended along with his stockpile of gunpowder. Tortured on the rack, he revealed the names of his co-conspirators. Some of them were killed while resisting arrest; others, including Fawkes, pled not guilty and went to trial, where they were convicted of high treason. In January, 1606, the remaining conspirators were hanged, drawn and quartered. Parliament immediately established Nov. 5 as a day of celebration.

Back to Fireworks Page

Some of the Softest Players in World Football

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In America, footballers have a reputation for being pansies, divers, cheats and uninterested in good old-fashioned contact.

Generally, this is untrue. But there are some high-profile players who unfortunately epitomize this stereotype and go through games whining, shouting at referees and crumbling to the ground at the slightest contact.

There are others who genuinely get injured at the slightest touch and yet more who must continually look for a cushier environment in which to play.

These most undesirable men are soft footballers, and here are some of the softest in the world.

Adel Taarabt

Watch any Queens Park Rangers match, and you will see the moody Adel Taarabt throwing himself all over the football pitch as he runs into defenders and loses the ball.

In addition to constantly flopping, he has a habit of screaming at the referees that don't believe his histrionic routine, which only serves to disgrace him more.

Walcott

How do I know that Theo Walcott is a diver? He's admitted it himself.

At least he had the guts to apologize for it, but anyone who watches Arsenal regularly knows that Walcott goes down at the slightest touch, and, worse, is a constant complainer.

Even after his own mistakes, which include running the ball out of play under absolutely no pressure, he will scream at his teammates for some perceived fault on their part; never acknowledging that it was he who erred.

Zlatan Ibrahimovic

Zlatan Ibrahimovic's footballing career has just been one protracted saga.

He has generated more money in transfer fees than any other player in history, and moves club on an almost yearly basis because he can never stay settled at any one.

Whether it was simply not getting along with the manager (Barcelona), not willing to put in the work for a year to get back to the big time (Juventus) or just asking for a ridiculous amount of money (AC Milan), Ibrahimovic always seems to find a way out.

And, despite the fact that he is a large, imposing man, he will buckle and whine at the slightest touch on the pitch.

Christiano Ronaldo

Ladies and gentlemen, meet Cristiano Ronaldo, the man who embodies everything that so many hate about the modern footballer.

Nearly every time he loses the ball, nearly every time a defender so much as touches him, nearly every tricky situation he finds himself in is responded to with a comedic flop and various gesticulations towards the referee.

Take one look at a man as tall, strong and powerful as Ronaldo, and it is obvious that he doesn't need to do these things and that, if he wanted to, he could play just as well with an honest approach.

Not C-Ron, though. His remarkable susceptibility to the basic challenge and the normal rigors of a football match make him the single softest player in world football.